As always, the thing about ease is that we have to choose it. And choosing can be tough because there’s no prescribed list of “This will be easy for me so I’ll do it.” You’ve got to do the work (in an easy way of course) to find out what is right, and easiest for you so that your best self can shine through.
No one else can know what creates a weight on your heart. It is such an inside job to choose ease. Only you can get yourself to your natural sweet spot.
And it isn’t always emotionally easy to choose the path of ease either. Sometimes to choose the path of ease means disappointing or upsetting the people around us who have different agendas for us.
Right now, for me, ease is about saying “no” to things. Not just “no” to more tasks, but anything that doesn’t have the feeling of ease when I think or talk about it. If anything feels heavy and hard or like I’d have to push it over the hill, I’m just saying no. I’m just stopping.
In a work context, often when we do certain tasks and accept certain jobs that aren’t in alignment with who we really are, we’re not working in our strengths. That is just taking ourselves further away from ease and creates a situation where we are stuck choosing struggle because we signed up for it before we realized what we are doing. (Why?!? Why oh why do we do this to ourselves?). Over time we can come to realize what will eventually lead to struggle and say NO to it when it first rears it’s ugly head.
Ease also applies to friendships and romantic relationships. We need to pursue the easy ones! (Or at the very least balance the easy with the hellish ones.) My benchmark for whether or not to be in a romantic relationship with a man is whether or not there’s ease. And whether or not it is “easy” together.
Too often, we choose to make things harder than they need to be. I’ve found this to be especially true while planning my Father’s memorial. I had the option to plan something with a lot of details – stuff that I’m not good at. For some reason, I felt it to be a badge of honour to break my back on this. (I’ve had clients come to me before with similar stories as well.)
We seem to think that if we choose ease, we’re taking the lazy route. But that’s simply in the eye of the beholder! And is entirely based on perception. When I think about them (so, my perception) lazy is restrictive, heavy and almost has a manipulative air about it. However ease is about doing what you’re natural at, what you’re drawn to, and what expands you, naturally. It is maximizing who you are. I know which is which for me by tuning into myself and getting that clarity
When we let ourselves be who we are then we get to be the best selves possible and our unique magic gets to shine. Magic (our unique contribution) comes from finding the path that is easy for us. It isn’t lazy to be who we are!
Simply put: Our truth is our truth. Our path is our path. Our own magic is our own magic. To stray from that disrupts the natural order of the world.
Okay over to you:
When have you chosen ease? What were the difficulties you faced in that process? I’d love to hear from you! Leave a comment below.