Have you ever had that experience where you know you have just been “put in your place” for daring to talk back to a man? Up until now it has just feel a feeling… now there is a word (freshly coined by yours truly)… Mangry!
That is what that guy was. He was mangry with you for daring, for not knowing your place, for in some way threatening his authority as a man.
In this video I present the definition of Mangry (a word I made up, coming from Man + Angry = Mangry) which is… the anger that men express when they feel owed or entitled based on their gender.
The felt experience of mangry, when it is coming at you, is that of disrespect and belittling. It minimizes the needs, wants, feeling and opinions of the person it is about or directed to. It is essentially saying “Who do you think you are?”, “You don’t matter”, “You need to be put in your place” and “How dare you?” (as in How dare you – have a differing opinion, say no to me, talk back to me, call me on my shit).
It arises when a man’s standing has been threatened: his superiority, his authority, his right.
And it is the weapon that enforces Patriarchy, by creating fear. Fear of Manger.
Women (and others) do a lot of emotional labour to try to make sure the men around us don’t get mangry and take it out on us. We do this by not speaking our truths, by minimizing and diluting ourselves, tip toeing and placating, all at our own expense.
Well enough of that! Now that we have a word for it, and an understanding of it… we can do something about it, we can do something different. We can change the system by speaking to it.
Starting NOW.
Let’s get into this Signyficant Conversation! Please share your comments below.
Men don’t feel superior for their sex. It’s their strength to weight, and the fact that women cannot defend themselves against brute force. So they should know their place to avoid getting in a fight with someone who can kick their ass, that’s just common sense. If you know a strong, angry woman you would be careful what you say around them, and maybe bite your tongue to avoid getting a fat lip. Same thing. Men are superior physically. Across the board. Men can do more physically than women. Just look at transgender champs in women’s sports. So if you don’t want to get a black eye or worse, follow your ancestors the chimpanzee and bow down to those who are stronger. Way of the world. I bite my tongue around meat heads all the time. This will not change just because you want it to. It’s unbendable.