You always have the option to choose in or out, including with gratitude. So, are you choosing gratitude? Like really choosing it, not default, sometimes, maybe if you remember to.
You see, not being in active gratitude is the same as non-gratitude. But non-gratitude, that ostensibly neutral place is actually going to create, at best, a mediocre life!
Let me explain.
We think there is sort of a “neutral”, or a middle ground with gratitude – but we are actually impacting the world, our world and other people’s world, either negatively or positively. Ungrateful is the other side of the coin. The active negative. “Non-gratitude” is that place in the middle, between gratitude (active positive) and ungrateful (active negative). We kid ourselves that it is “neutral”, neither positive nor negative, but it actually has an impact. We’re either bringing forth more gratitude or shutting gratitude down. It is not in the least neutral. Just like ungrateful, it also does damage. Why? Because it pulls you towards the vortex of ungratefulness, and that, my friends, is where the trouble starts!
Being non-grateful is almost like creating the environment that is good for fungus to grow in…it’s like it’s fertile ground for the negativity, because there isn’t positivity. The only antidote is living in genuine gratitude.
My most positive emotions are joy and gratitude. When I’m bubbling over with joy and gratitude, I see what’s great in the world. I see what’s possible. I love life and everyone and everyone in it. But there were a couple of days recently where I was trying to be not-negative. I was trying to be not ungrateful. And that is such a far cry from being joyful or being grateful (even the English language tells us the double negatives are tricky at best). I realized that what I was doing was playing not to lose, instead of playing to win. I was in the place of not doing myself any damage, but that can’t be the end goal. It must be about stepping into gratitude, joy, flow, all those powerful positive places. Not just avoiding the sucky stuff.
There is the thing, most of us are living in that neutral (“non-grateful) or the negative (ungrateful) place at least some percentage of the time. And mostly that is by default, by being unconscious of it and the damage it does. We can change that by getting conscious about our choices. We need to actually choose not just avoiding the sucky stuff, we need to consciously, actively and intentionally choose the yummy stuff. We need to lean in. This is where participation is mandatory comes back in again. You can’t just walk that safe, fine line and hope you’ll have a decent life. If you want your life to be exceptional, and who doesn’t, you’ve gotta go for it!
Wanna know how to do that? Check out next week’s blog where I’ll talk about how to LIVE gratitude.
Ok over to you:
Where are you on the gratitude continua? What are some ways you can actively choose gratitude in your life?