It’s interesting because when I think about our lives in terms of connection, there seems to be a common (mis)understanding that connection happens to us. Like it’s something that is somehow externally created or driven. We make the assumption that because someone grows up in a close-knit community, connection (at least with that community) is easy. Connection is easy, like they learned how to do it, and they already have their connections, all sewn up. Or if they have a close-knit family, same thing… connection is easy. If they attended the same school for a long time, connection is easy. And if you don’t have any of those structures, connection is hard, if not impossible for you…
But we don’t realize how much connection is a choice and that we actually have to make ourselves open to it! (Yes, this is the ‘Choose Connection’ post, how did you guess?!?)
When I look at choosing connection it is about opening our hearts, and that can be hard and scary for people, especially if they’ve been hurt (in love relationships, in friendships, or by people who were supposed to be trustworthy). Connection is still a choice, even for them. Sure, there is a likely a first step of mending their heart, but it’s such a worthy step!
There are 3 main areas of life where we can look for connection:
- Connection with other people: As I touched on before, if you’ve been hurt or betrayed it is easy to close off your heart and stop the flow of love in and out. But take that step of healing your heart and open yourself up to the value of connecting with those around you! Be that a romantic connection, or creating the connection of friendship, or really connecting with co-workers, family members, etc.
- Connection with self: This is all about being in a place of really listening to your own self, your own heart. What do you desire or feel? What makes your heart sing? What’s really important to you? From there we also need to connect to our own voice, our own Inner Guidance System (IGS) and vocalize those things that we’ve been playing small around.
When we do this it allows us not only to make decisions more effectively, but also to have the courage to speak out about our choices. To stand up for what we need and want in the world! (And if you struggle with the strength and fortitude to stand firm and tall in these situations, you’ll need to connect with your higher power as well…read on!)
- Connection with something bigger than us: Be that something that you’ve already defined (God, Goddess, Buddha, Mohammad, Allah) or not! The important part is to realize that there is clearly something bigger than you at work in the world. Because, I don’t know about you, but I sure can’t make the sun rise every morning! So call this higher power what you will, whatever works for you, but allow yourself to actively participate in creating that relationship. By nurturing that connection it becomes easy to tap into it when you need to remember that you’re a part of something bigger. (And boy oh boy, do I ever need to remember that some days!)
Remember, connection isn’t just going to happen to you. You need to get active and choose it!
Okay over to you:
Which of these 3 areas are you called to connect more deeply? What steps will you take towards that? I’d love to hear from you! Leave a comment below.
In case you missed it, be sure to read their stories
…and then #TakeBackYourLife!